The training of deep neural networks is inherently a nonconvex optimization problem, yet standard approaches such as stochastic gradient descent (SGD) require simultaneous updates to all parameters, often leading to unstable convergence and high computational cost. To address these issues, we propose a novel method, Stochastic Alternating Minimization with Trainable Step Sizes (SAMT), which updates network parameters in an alternating manner by treating the weights of each layer as a block. By decomposing the overall optimization into sub-problems corresponding to different blocks, this block-wise alternating strategy reduces per-step computational overhead and enhances training stability in nonconvex settings. To fully leverage these benefits, inspired by meta-learning, we proposed a novel adaptive step size strategy to incorporate into the sub-problem solving steps of alternating updates. It supports different types of trainable step sizes, including but not limited to scalar, element-wise, row-wise, and column-wise, enabling adaptive step size selection tailored to each block via meta-learning. We further provide a theoretical convergence guarantee for the proposed algorithm, establishing its optimization soundness. Extensive experiments for multiple benchmarks demonstrate that SAMT achieves better generalization performance with fewer parameter updates compared to state-of-the-art methods, highlighting its effectiveness and potential in neural network optimization.